“Grief is closely allied with anger. They are expressed with similar sounds: moans, groans, shouts, and screams. Like anger, grief responds to a terrible loss or terrible harm done — but without any sense of the possibility of reparation. Anger turns the pain outward, against others; grief turns it inward, to the self. People subsumed by rage try to replicate the wrongs they have suffered by hurting others. Those consumed by grief long to turn their own bodies into that of the dead loved one, by lying down in the ground, cutting the hair, scratching the face, and rolling in the dust. The enraged want to humiliate, hurt, or kill; the grief-stricken want to be dead and to inhabit the perspective of the dead.
But grief is different from anger, because it can be expressed and experienced collectively. Through the funeral rites and games for the dead Patroclus in Book 23, Achilles shares his loss with other Greek warriors, just as the Trojans in Book 24 are able to share their grief at the death of Hector. Even enemies, like Priam and Achilles, can share a moment of grief. Anger drives communities apart; grief brings them together, over a shared acknowledgment of irredeemable loss.”
Emily Wilson’s Introduction to The Iliad, p. xliii
